Sunday, 21 March 2010
On Death
Waking up late than usual, Visiting library to issue or renew books, visiting a cybre cafe and return home at around 1.30 or 2.00 pm. This is my usual routine on every Sunday morning. But yesterday it was disturbed.
Just as I was leaving home for the library yesterday I got a call from my cousin informing me of the death of her grandfather-in-law and the ANTIMYATRA procession scheduled at 11.00 am. I told this to mom and as she was not feeling well she asked me to attend the ceremony. I feel awkward at attending such ceremonies and I never took part in any as long as my father was there.
When I reached there with towel around my shoulders, I was amongst the first few to arrive. I saw my brother-in-law and my uncle among few other relatives. The atmosphere was heavy but it was not gloomy because the person who died was 98 years old and he died peacefully in sleep. The younger the person who has died, the more severe the pain is of the mourner. Death - the word itself creates a sense of uneasy feeling. And that feeling becomes heavier when you sit beside a dead body of a person maybe your relative, one whom we were in contact with or one for whom you felt great respect, awe, faith and love.
Then mourners started coming in singles, in pairs or in groups. The stretcher was ready when the van from the crematorium arrived. We supported it with our shoulders to the van. The van started towards Ramnathpara crematorium situated on the bank of the river Aji. Crematorium is traditionally built either on the banks of the river or near it.
The body was placed on the pyre and buried with the cakes of dow-dung and logs. It took around two-three hours for the holy fire to make the ashes from the old bones of the dead. When you observe ANTIMSANSKAR procedure of an unknown person, you realise that one day this is also going to happen with your body after the death. But if the person is your near and dear one you hardly think of your death because at that time your mind is engrossed with so many feelings especially the feeling of nothingness and of helplessness. You just can't do anything except mourning for the dead. The fact that you are not going to see that man ever again in your life time, you are not going to hug him/her any more or you are not going to talk with him/her eats your heart away. At the most you can see them smiling in the photographs but never in person. A painful truth!
Just as I was leaving home for the library yesterday I got a call from my cousin informing me of the death of her grandfather-in-law and the ANTIMYATRA procession scheduled at 11.00 am. I told this to mom and as she was not feeling well she asked me to attend the ceremony. I feel awkward at attending such ceremonies and I never took part in any as long as my father was there.
When I reached there with towel around my shoulders, I was amongst the first few to arrive. I saw my brother-in-law and my uncle among few other relatives. The atmosphere was heavy but it was not gloomy because the person who died was 98 years old and he died peacefully in sleep. The younger the person who has died, the more severe the pain is of the mourner. Death - the word itself creates a sense of uneasy feeling. And that feeling becomes heavier when you sit beside a dead body of a person maybe your relative, one whom we were in contact with or one for whom you felt great respect, awe, faith and love.
Then mourners started coming in singles, in pairs or in groups. The stretcher was ready when the van from the crematorium arrived. We supported it with our shoulders to the van. The van started towards Ramnathpara crematorium situated on the bank of the river Aji. Crematorium is traditionally built either on the banks of the river or near it.
The body was placed on the pyre and buried with the cakes of dow-dung and logs. It took around two-three hours for the holy fire to make the ashes from the old bones of the dead. When you observe ANTIMSANSKAR procedure of an unknown person, you realise that one day this is also going to happen with your body after the death. But if the person is your near and dear one you hardly think of your death because at that time your mind is engrossed with so many feelings especially the feeling of nothingness and of helplessness. You just can't do anything except mourning for the dead. The fact that you are not going to see that man ever again in your life time, you are not going to hug him/her any more or you are not going to talk with him/her eats your heart away. At the most you can see them smiling in the photographs but never in person. A painful truth!
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